Image by Cathy G

It seems only natural to end “Drunk Week” with a bevy of cocktails – screwdrivers, to be exact. There are endless variations on the standard screwdriver cocktail; I’ve listed the most common ones below. I hope you all enjoyed this week as much as I have – I’m off to find the orange juice!

The CTS Ultimate Screwdriver Compendium

To your basic screwdriver (whatever ratio of orange juice to vodka suits your fancy), add:

• 1 ounce Southern Comfort for a Comfortable Screw
• 1 ounce peach schnapps for a Fuzzy Screw
• 1 ounce sloe gin for a Slow Screw
• A splash of galliano for a Screw Against the Wall
• A splash of amaretto for a Screw with a Kiss
• Ice for a Cold, Hard Screw
• Lemon-lime soda for a Screw Up

Combine any of the above to make “compound screws”. For example:

• Slow Comfortable Screw with a Kiss (sloe gin, Southern Comfort, amaretto)
• Cold, Hard Screw Up Against the Wall ( ice, lemon-lime soda, galliano)

You could, of course, combine them all into a Slow, Comfortable, Fuzzy, Cold, Hard Screw Up Against a Wall with a Kiss, but I can’t imagine it would taste very good.
If you have a favorite variant that I missed, let me know in the comments, and I’ll add it to the list!

Frozen Pineapple Delight

Ingredients:

• 1/4 cup simple syrup
• 1/2 cup pineapple juice
• 1/4 teaspoon minced ginger
• 1/4 cup triple sec
• 1/4 cup vodka
• 1 cup pineapple chunks, frozen

Combine all ingredients in a blender and pulse until smooth. The frozen pineapple gives the drink a slushy consistency.

Serves 4.

In keeping with the Hawaiian theme from yesterday and today, here’s a drink recipe from that same catering file, doctored up a bit for the cocktail hour. Enjoy!

Luau Lemonade

Ingredients:

• 2 parts lemon juice
• 2 parts simple syrup
• 2 parts pineapple juice
• 3 parts ginger ale
• 1 part apricot brandy

Shake all ingredients over ice and strain into a chilled glass. Garnish with a maraschino cherry or pineapple chunk (and an umbrella, of course.)

Image by PussNBoots

The three components of this dish, cherry, lime, and bourbon, complement each other so well that I’m surprised this drink isn’t a standard summertime picnic fare. To add some sparkle to your drink, substitute sparkling water for plain. On hot August evenings, add extra ice and run it through a blender for a frozen treat.

Cherry-Bourbon Limeade

Ingredients:

• 1 1/2 cups freshly squeeze lime juice
• 1 cup simple syrup
• 4 cups ice water
• 2 cups fresh or frozen cherries, pitted and halved
• 1/3 cup sugar
• 2 cups bourbon

In a small bowl, toss cherries and sugar. Set aside to macerate at room temperature for 1 hour.

In a tall pitcher, stir lime juice, syrup, bourbon, and water. Add cherries with their juices and mix well. Serve immediately in tall glasses or champagne flutes.

Serves 6-8.

Image by mrpattersonsir

There aren’t many summertime pleasures as lovely as a truly fresh margarita. This recipe is equal parts tequila, triple sec, and fresh lime juice; it’s the fresh juice that sets this far apart from other ‘ritas out there. Be wary of the tequila, though – it will sneak up on you.

1:1:1 Margaritas

Ingredients:

• 1 part freshly squeezed lime juice
• 1 part tequila
• 1 part triple sec

Pour all ingredients over ice and shake well. Pour into a salt-rimmed glass to serve.

Serves one to 1,000, depending on quantities.

Image by Cainmark

In 2001 (or so the date of the email tells me), I was subscribed to an email list entitled “Disgusting Drink of the Month” through the now-defunct Emazing.com. For some reason, I printed that June’s drink, and it has been mixed in to my recipe file ever since. This drink uses enough different types of booze to make up for last week’s non-alcoholic drink, and then some.

Passed Out Naked on the Bathroom Floor

Ingredients:

• 1/4 ounce peppermint schnapps
• 1/4 ounce Jägermeister
• 1/4 ounce gold tequila
• 1/4 ounce Bacardi 151

Combine all ingredients in a shot glass, and “prepare your innards for a feeling that goes a little beyond warm and fuzzy”, or so says June 2001′s Disgusting Drink of the Month newsletter.

Serves one.

In my late teenage years, my best friend Topher and I frequented the local Olive Garden; we were such regulars that we had a favorite waitress. (A decade later, the “Hospitaliano!” pin she gave us is still pinned to lapel of my leather jacket.) Their Sicilian Splash was my beverage of choice, and served as a nice refreshing balance to the heaviness of the entrees. I picked apart the flavors for years before I finally hit on this combination of ingredients. I don’t know if they still serve this drink, but the “impostor” recipe below is close enough to my memories that it takes me right back to those lazy afternoons spent with a dear friend.

Citrus Sparkle

Ingredients:

• 3 cups ice cubes
• 1 1/2 cups white grape juice
• 1 1/2 cups orange soda or orange sparkling water
• 2 cups club soda
• Lemon wedges for garnish

Combine all ingredients in a tall pitcher and stir gently. Pour into tall glasses and garnish with lemon. Serve immediately.

Serves 4-6.

I’m not ashamed to admit that first-run Sex and the City episodes sparked my interest in Cosmopolitans. I enjoy a bit more body to my beverage, however, and was thrilled to find exactly what I needed in the South Beach Cosmopolitan. The addition of raspberry liqueur adds an unctuous quality that raises this drink to new heights of sophistication.

South Beach Cosmopolitan

Ingredients:

• 1 ounce cranberry juice
• 3 ounces citrus vodka
• 1 ounce raspberry liqueur
• 1 maraschino cherry

Combine all ingredients over ice in a cocktail shaker and agitate gently. Pour into a chilled martini glass and garnish with a cherry.

Serves 1.